STAY AT HOME DRESS

Horace and Agnes go out almost every weekend but sometimes Agnes puts on her “stay-at-home dress” to signal they’re in for the night.
Her quilted Asian-style ensemble is strictly used for lounging and occasional hair dyeing. Horace doesn’tmind staying in. He’s content to lean up against Agnes and peruse his record collection. The phone rings and Agnes starts chattering away under the hair dryer. Horace thinks it’s one of her girlfriends and that she’ll be on the phone for hours, but she’s off in a flash. “Who was that?” Horace asks.
“Your lovely neighbor Irene,” Agnes says with a fake smile.
“What does Ms. Klench want this time?”
“You left the trash cans out too long this week,” Agnes shouts from underneath her hair dryer.
Horace grimaces. “I can’t believe you’re nice to that pill.”
“Horace my love, we all know you get more flies with honey, and we get fewer calls from Irene when you bring the trash cans in on time.”